Peaches and Scream by Chelsea Thomas

Author:Chelsea Thomas [Thomas, Chelsea]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Big and Little Press
Published: 2020-05-30T16:00:00+00:00

29

Checked Out

Teeny and I hurried back to the freight elevator and rode back down to the kitchen. I think we were both pretty scared because neither of us said anything. No matter how many times you confront a murderer or get close to learning the truth in a big investigation, those moments never cease to be shocking.

On the one hand, I was glad not to be some sort of jaded, grizzled veteran of murder investigations. That would have been sad. On the other hand, I wished both of my hands would stop shaking and my heartbeat would slow the heck down.

When we emerged out of the freight elevator and into the kitchen, Miss May was still talking to the square-headed woman. Well, the square-headed woman was talking. Miss May was waiting with her most impatient “I’m trying to be patient” face.

Miss May interrupted the square-headed woman’s diatribe as we approached. “I understand your point, Matilda. I appreciate that you’re running a large-scale operation here. But you can’t deny a delicious pie. I can deliver these pies at a five or ten percent lower rate than what I normally do. I’m almost losing money on that deal. This could be a good relationship. I’m only offering you this deal because I feel so strongly that even those of us whom society has marginalized deserve to eat well.”

The square-headed lady, whose name I assumed was Matilda, shrugged. “I’m sorry. To be honest I don’t like the pie.”

Miss May batted her eyelashes. That was the first and last time I ever heard anyone say anything disparaging about Miss May’s pie. From the look on Miss May’s face, it was a new experience for her too. “What do you mean you don’t like the pie?” Miss May laughed. “This pie is award-winning. The apples are picked from my orchard. I’m using a recipe that I’ve worked on for decades. The crust is often called divine. Once an elderly man took a bite of my pie and it literally killed him with joy. May he rest in peace.”

“I don’t like it.”

I took a ginger step forward. “Excuse me. Sorry. But uh, we’re back and we’re ready to go.”

“Back from where?” The square-headed woman look suspicious.

“The...bathroom,” I said. “We found the bathroom. And we both really had to go so it took a while.”

Teeny pointed a finger in the air. “Yes. I have irritable bowel syndrome. IBS for short. I’m also just irritable. And I really would like to leave this horrible institution. If you don’t like my friend’s pie, then you should be upstairs with the patients. Because it is the most delicious, scrumptious, buttery, luscious pie I have ever eaten. I’m proud to call it my favorite pie. Now if you’ll excuse us.”

Teeny charged away. I followed behind her. Miss May held her chin in the air with pride. “Yes. Please excuse us.”

My aunt spun on her heels and followed right behind Teeny and me.

Back in the car, Miss May could not believe what we told her about Lillian Edwards.

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